The Art and Science of ‘Suffering’


Suffering only exists in the constructs of our imagination. Let’s imagine you are sitting at Starbuck’s and a cute girl walks through the door. You notice her and immediately your monkey mind starts racing. The conversation taking place in your head simultaneously sounds like, “Should I go talk to her… she probably has a boyfriend… I wouldn’t know what to say… dude don’t blow your chance… you would be super soft if you didn’t talk to her.” These thoughts create neurochemical responses of survival. If this isn’t the first time that this has happened then we are recreating an event. We are continuing to hard wire our subconscious program. Neurons that fire together wire together. This exact conversation is reinforcing the neural networks in your brain.

She grabs her mocha Frappuccino and walks out without you saying a word. Your thoughts continue to spin, “I should have gone up to her… you always blow it… when are you going to man up.” Now you have created a level of judgment around this situation. Your thoughts reinforce the survival chemicals, which tend to be unpleasant. You continue to speak to yourself in a judgmental way. This tells your nervous system and your subconscious mind to automate this process the next time this happens. You have now created the habit of suffering around a particular situation.

In order to avoid these feelings, you may never go to that coffee shop again. Because if you do, the very next time a girl walks in who you have the urge to talk to, you will have the same conditioned thoughts. We as humans create imaginary walls. We construct chains of resistance. This closes us off to situations in an attempt to protect ourselves. It is a survival mechanism. We want to avoid these feelings at all cost. The more we resist these feelings the stronger these feelings are wired. Whatever we resist persists. There is no way around these fear-based responses, the only way is through.

The way out is through awareness and acceptance. We must become aware that we triggered a subconscious response of discomfort. We must accept that we have conditioned ourselves to feel this way from the past. The more often this event has occurred the stronger the hardwired program of the subconscious. Every time we become aware and accept these feelings, we break the bonds of the conditioning. The more we do this, the weaker the neurochemical response to this program and the weaker the neural network pattern. We decrease the transit time of these neurochemicals. Now instead of focusing our thoughts on a hardwired program all that exists is space. Space is the precursor to magic because it is the foundation to creation.

We can now use our conscious mind to focus our attention on something we want to create in its place. Perhaps we use the situation and re-frame it as a gift. Where we have conditioned resistance or survival emotions is an area of growth. Overcoming the hardwired programs and dissolving the suffering allows for more freedom to enter one’s life. And if we understand the limiting belief underlying these thoughts, we can now re-design more empowering beliefs.

Now the next time that cute girl walks into to Starbuck’s you either decide to talk to her or not. You are free either way. You have now reclaimed your inner power. Now something outside of you does not have the ability to make you feel the emotions of suffering. You have untethered your emotional conditioning of a situation. The more areas in life where you re-pattern the subconscious the more freedom now lies in your future. This is the process of an awakening human.

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